Dispatches from Outland
A little song. A little dance. A little seltzer down your pants. Copyright © 2003 Roy M. Jacobsen.


Thursday, February 05, 2004  

Flush the 60s Department: James Lileks notes that a John Kerry speech ended with the Jimi Hendrix tune "Purple Haze." The idea of revisiting the 60s and the whole Vietnam war leaves him less than enthusiastic.

God no. Please no. I think I speak for millions when I say that I am deathly sick of the counterculture sixties. The music, the war, the protests, all the hagiography - it's not a reflection of the era’s importance but the self-importance of the generation who hung on the bus as it trundled along down the same old rutted road of history.. I’m tired of hearing about the boomers’ days of whine and neuroses; I’m weary of ritual genuflection to their musical icons; I’m utterly disinterested in most of the pop-cult trivia they hold so dear. We’ll probably be better off when that demographic pig has been excreted from the python so we can see the era clearly without choking on the smoke.

What's the message here? John Kerry is best suited to lead us in the present war because he was a prominent opponant of the last one, which we lost. John Kerry led the fight to leave South Vietnam to the mercies of the North. John Kerry would rather lose a theater for the right reasons than win it for reasons the critics derided. Dress it up however you like, but that’s what it came down to; college students marched not against the Vietnamese war but the American participation in that conflict. Anyone fill the Mall in DC to protest the reeducation camps? Any Solidarity with the Boat People committees formed on campuses after the fall of the south?
"...days of whine and neuroses." That's a keeper.

He also vents a bit about Patrick Stewart's latest pronouncements that exploring space is a bad idea.

posted by Roy M. Jacobsen at 8:55 AM
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Wednesday, February 04, 2004  

Pushing Back The Boundaries Of Stupidity Department: The spam I've been receiving of late is so poorly spelled (in an attempt to get past spam filters) as to be virtually incomprehensible. Here are a few examples:

Suwper chafrge your lojve liwfe!
Orfder your Vkiagora and Saupter Vihaglra sahfely and securmely onlipne.

Cixalxis (Sukper Vieaxgra) takes affject riglht away and latsts for darys!

Genneoric Vizagyra coests 60% leses, sagve lots of cadsh!

Both prodzucts shiepped discreetely to your donor
That gem came with the subject line of "bonito coxcomb." "Genneoric Vizagyra"? That sounds like a malady, not a medication.

Another, with the subject "delicatessen rex," offers "The hemalthy way to loyse fhat and keep it owff." Huh. I thought that something was good if it was "fhat." (Or is that "phat?") And "owff" is what the villains say when Batman punches them in the gut.

I'm not sure what's more pathetic: someone who puts out an advertising message that looks as if it was typed by a poorly trained chimpanzee, or that there are people out there who actually respond to these things.

posted by Roy M. Jacobsen at 12:19 PM
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Monday, February 02, 2004  

Bandwagon Department: I'll join the happy throng of post-Super Bowl commenters with a couple of observations.

First, the game (especially the second half) was one of the best Super Bowl games in recent history. I really didn't have a horse in this race, I just wanted an entertaining game, and I got it. I'll leave the in-depth analysis to others more qualified, but it seemed to me that the outcome really hinged on two things:

1. Penalties against the Panthers. There were far too many stupid penalties against Carolina, and several of them broke their momentum.

2. You can look at this one from two directions. Either Carolina's offensive line wasn't giving Delhomme enough protection, or the Patriots defensive line was too strong for the Panthers. Either way, Delhomme didn't have as much time to make passes as Brady did. Even so, he made some amazing passes, and if he'd had more time to find a receiver, the outcome could have been very different.

Now as for the halftime "show" it was a complete waste of time. I wasn't shocked (which was what MTV was promising--or threatening, depending on our point of view). I was bored and offended (if that combination is possible). And with Nelly saying "take off all your clothes" and Justin Timberlake singing he wanted to "have you naked by the end of this song," why would anyone be shocked when he tore Janet Jackson's top open? The whole affair was lame.

Now, when U2 performed in 2002, that would have been a great show if you could have heard it better.

posted by Roy M. Jacobsen at 9:23 AM
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