Dispatches from Outland
A little song. A little dance. A little seltzer down your pants. Copyright © 2003 Roy M. Jacobsen.

Friday, February 14, 2003  

We Try Harder Department: Dispatches from Outland is the Number 2 result for a Google search on "family friendly blog." That's our goal, and we're working hard to get to the Number 1 position. Thanks for your support.

posted by Roy M. Jacobsen at 9:48 PM

Thursday, February 13, 2003  

From The Inbox Department: A co-worker just sent me this one, so I imagine it's appearing in several e-mail inboxes right about now:

Subject: The war on terrorism

The Canadians are going to help America with the war on terrorism. They have pledged 2 of their biggest battle ships, 6000 ground troops and 6 fighter jets.

Unfortunately, after the exchange rate conversion, we ended up with 2 canoes, 1 Mountie, and some flying squirrels.

posted by Roy M. Jacobsen at 11:11 AM

Good Questions Department: If that really is Osama on that tape, why doesn't he mention anything about the Columbia disaster, especially about the Israeli astronaut who died on the Columbia? You'd think he'd view that as a "fire and brimestone, wrath of Allah smiting the infidel Americans and Jews" sort of thing.

I'm not the only one asking this.

posted by Roy M. Jacobsen at 8:29 AM

Tuesday, February 11, 2003  

Fighting Great Battles Department: Ted Turner has openly and frequently dissed Christians and Christianity. But things aren't always exactly what they seem. For example, Turner claims to have been "born again seven times, so one of them is bound to take." He even had seriously considered becoming a missionary. And then his sister died a painful death from lupus. Turner's reaction was an unsurprising "'How could God let my sister suffer so much?"

Rod Dreher offers some interesting observations and thoughts on Ted Turner, and closes with this: "Regarding this tortured man, I am reminded of a saying attributed to the Jewish philosopher Philo of Alexandria: 'Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.'"

Wouldn't we all do well to remember that?

posted by Roy M. Jacobsen at 10:10 AM

On The Funny Pages Department: From Zits, by Jerry Scott and Jim Borgman:

Jeremy: I've been eating an all vegetarian diet this week.
Autumn:Really? I'm impressed. How's it working out?
Jeremy:Not so good I'm afraid. It turns out that they're harder to catch than cows are! Plus, the meat is a lot stringier!

posted by Roy M. Jacobsen at 8:51 AM
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